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1
00:00:29,929 --> 00:00:33,783
(? theme from
"the twilight zone"?)

2
00:00:39,439 --> 00:00:43,026
(heartbeat)

3
00:01:12,489 --> 00:01:16,109
mr. schlesinger,
it's morning.

4
00:01:21,414 --> 00:01:24,300
(alarm sounding)

5
00:01:26,069 --> 00:01:30,974
doll:
it's 6:00 a.m.
eastern daylight time.

6
00:01:30,974 --> 00:01:31,991
rise and shine, barney, dear.

7
00:01:31,991 --> 00:01:34,494
? get up, get up,
you sleepyhead ?

8
00:01:34,494 --> 00:01:36,229
? get up, get up... ?

9
00:01:36,229 --> 00:01:37,447
too loud, honey.

10
00:01:37,447 --> 00:01:38,698
and too late.

11
00:01:57,734 --> 00:02:00,420
for most of us,
our heart's desire

12
00:02:00,420 --> 00:02:02,922
seems to lie behind
a bolted door.

13
00:02:02,922 --> 00:02:06,042
but what if the lives
we find so familiar

14
00:02:06,042 --> 00:02:09,179
were someone else's
dream come true?

15
00:02:09,179 --> 00:02:11,681
perhaps, for all of us,
somewhere is a hidden door

16
00:02:12,298 --> 00:02:14,184
into the twilight zone.

17
00:02:16,603 --> 00:02:18,471
oh, shut up.

18
00:02:18,471 --> 00:02:22,225
isn't this the time of day
when people are shot?

19
00:02:23,476 --> 00:02:25,195
morning.

20
00:02:25,195 --> 00:02:28,848
rise and shine.

21
00:02:28,848 --> 00:02:31,201
still dead, huh?

22
00:02:31,201 --> 00:02:33,570
well, i tried.

23
00:02:33,570 --> 00:02:36,706
i ought to get a lawyer.

24
00:02:36,706 --> 00:02:38,575
morning,
honey.

25
00:02:38,575 --> 00:02:42,328
if it isn't the creature
who lives in the basement.

26
00:02:42,328 --> 00:02:43,580
cleaning it up, i hope.

27
00:02:43,580 --> 00:02:47,300
katie, my girl, my girl,

28
00:02:47,300 --> 00:02:49,169
what do you think?

29
00:02:49,169 --> 00:02:51,671
it's alive.
big deal.

30
00:02:52,305 --> 00:02:53,556
no, it's not.

31
00:02:53,556 --> 00:02:57,026
barney, i may
have been born
with a black thumb,

32
00:02:57,026 --> 00:03:00,163
but i can tell
a live plant
from a dead one.

33
00:03:00,163 --> 00:03:01,414
that one's alive.

34
00:03:01,414 --> 00:03:05,168
technically it's not,
because i made it.

35
00:03:05,168 --> 00:03:07,670
rather than watering
things all day,

36
00:03:08,288 --> 00:03:12,041
you just wind
it up like this.

37
00:03:12,041 --> 00:03:13,293
oh, great.

38
00:03:13,293 --> 00:03:14,544
another practical
invention

39
00:03:14,544 --> 00:03:17,046
from the mind
of barney schlesinger.

40
00:03:17,046 --> 00:03:20,183
too bad you don't
apply that much effort

41
00:03:20,183 --> 00:03:22,051
to your job.

42
00:03:22,051 --> 00:03:25,188
it only took me
about five nights.

43
00:03:25,188 --> 00:03:26,439
it took god six days.

44
00:03:26,439 --> 00:03:28,908
but he made
the original.

45
00:03:28,908 --> 00:03:32,028
you just made
a copy, barney.

46
00:03:32,028 --> 00:03:36,416
i guess that means
you don't want this up here?

47
00:03:36,416 --> 00:03:38,918
shouldn't you
be getting
ready for work?

48
00:03:38,918 --> 00:03:42,038
i'll take that as a no.

49
00:03:49,112 --> 00:03:51,831
nobody needs copies, barney.

50
00:03:51,831 --> 00:03:54,250
tell that
to xerox.

51
00:03:54,250 --> 00:03:58,471
(train whistle blows)

52
00:03:59,722 --> 00:04:01,741
it was supposed
to be a gift.

53
00:04:01,741 --> 00:04:03,993
i thought
she'd like it.

54
00:04:03,993 --> 00:04:06,195
why should
katie like it?

55
00:04:06,195 --> 00:04:07,447
she can't kill it.

56
00:04:07,447 --> 00:04:09,332
come on,
face it, barn.

57
00:04:09,332 --> 00:04:11,701
you got
a blue-sky mind.

58
00:04:11,701 --> 00:04:14,203
marconi could have
learned things from you.

59
00:04:14,203 --> 00:04:17,874
your timing
just isn't right.

60
00:04:17,874 --> 00:04:20,576
you're a little,
i don't know...

61
00:04:20,576 --> 00:04:21,828
out of step.

62
00:04:21,828 --> 00:04:25,498
i thought that mouse missile
thing had real possibilities.

63
00:04:25,498 --> 00:04:26,749
it was deadly.

64
00:04:26,749 --> 00:04:27,817
yeah.

65
00:04:27,817 --> 00:04:29,319
except the explosion

66
00:04:29,319 --> 00:04:32,822
left little mouse parts
all over the place.

67
00:04:32,822 --> 00:04:35,825
people prefer their nice,
neat traps, i guess.

68
00:04:35,825 --> 00:04:38,528
you getting enough sleep?

69
00:04:38,895 --> 00:04:41,364
mm-hmm.

70
00:04:41,364 --> 00:04:43,199
four solid hours
a night.

71
00:04:43,199 --> 00:04:45,201
you see, barn,
that's no good.

72
00:04:45,201 --> 00:04:48,638
you can't get anywhere
by working yourself to death.

73
00:04:48,638 --> 00:04:50,440
having those dreams again?

74
00:04:50,556 --> 00:04:53,009
every night for the past week.

75
00:04:53,009 --> 00:04:55,328
what was it this time--
a garden party?

76
00:04:55,328 --> 00:04:58,448
or just examining
your collection of fine...?

77
00:04:58,448 --> 00:05:01,534
just waking up, that's all.

78
00:05:01,534 --> 00:05:05,104
who's waking up--
you or the guy in the dream?

79
00:05:05,104 --> 00:05:07,206
me.

80
00:05:07,206 --> 00:05:08,458
him.

81
00:05:08,458 --> 00:05:10,326
the both of us.

82
00:05:12,779 --> 00:05:14,781
milt, ever since i was a kid,

83
00:05:14,781 --> 00:05:18,534
i've felt i was living
in two worlds at the same time.

84
00:05:21,621 --> 00:05:24,157
two worlds
that are kind of side by side

85
00:05:24,791 --> 00:05:26,659
but very different, you know?

86
00:05:26,659 --> 00:05:29,162
this is getting confusing.

87
00:05:29,162 --> 00:05:32,915
so, enjoy the fantasy.

88
00:05:32,915 --> 00:05:35,418
at least you got that much.

89
00:05:35,668 --> 00:05:38,738
yeah, but it's happening
every night lately,

90
00:05:38,738 --> 00:05:40,623
and i'm just worried.

91
00:05:40,623 --> 00:05:44,243
do you think maybe
i'm losing my mind?

92
00:05:44,243 --> 00:05:46,329
you? come on, barn.

93
00:06:08,217 --> 00:06:10,019
nice day, mr. schlesinger.

94
00:06:10,019 --> 00:06:11,721
aren't they all,
steve?

95
00:06:11,721 --> 00:06:13,973
may i ask you
a question, sir?

96
00:06:13,973 --> 00:06:15,725
a little inside
information?

97
00:06:16,909 --> 00:06:19,162
trimboline splits at 50.

98
00:06:19,162 --> 00:06:21,664
i want you to stick with us.

99
00:06:21,664 --> 00:06:22,849
thank you.

100
00:06:38,247 --> 00:06:40,266
(thunder crashing)

101
00:06:40,266 --> 00:06:43,086
sorry i'm late.

102
00:06:43,086 --> 00:06:44,971
i suppose you're
expecting dinner?

103
00:06:44,971 --> 00:06:46,222
oh, sure. dinner.

104
00:06:46,222 --> 00:06:49,976
no. let's talk first,
shall we?

105
00:06:53,629 --> 00:06:56,582
you promised you wouldn't
disturb my workshop.

106
00:06:56,582 --> 00:06:59,602
no, you promised me
you'd clean it up.

107
00:07:13,716 --> 00:07:18,104
barney, this stuff
has been down here
since we moved in.

108
00:07:18,104 --> 00:07:19,305
look at it.

109
00:07:19,305 --> 00:07:21,624
look at us.

110
00:07:21,624 --> 00:07:23,359
it's just wrong.

111
00:07:30,483 --> 00:07:31,701
all right.

112
00:07:31,701 --> 00:07:32,819
you're right, honey.

113
00:07:33,453 --> 00:07:34,554
i'll just...

114
00:07:34,554 --> 00:07:38,157
i'll clean
this stuff up.

115
00:07:38,157 --> 00:07:41,110
i know we can
start over fresh

116
00:07:41,110 --> 00:07:44,780
and you can stop working
on these stupid inventions.

117
00:07:44,780 --> 00:07:46,616
they're not stupid.

118
00:07:46,849 --> 00:07:48,568
even if
they were,

119
00:07:48,568 --> 00:07:50,987
i don't think i could stop.

120
00:07:51,354 --> 00:07:53,706
my mind just
works that way.

121
00:07:53,706 --> 00:07:56,125
then let your mind
work on this:

122
00:07:56,125 --> 00:07:59,712
if you want to
sleep in my bed,

123
00:07:59,712 --> 00:08:01,848
you'll clean this up tonight.

124
00:08:10,540 --> 00:08:12,692
some choice.

125
00:08:12,692 --> 00:08:14,377
(alarm sounds)

126
00:08:14,377 --> 00:08:16,679
doll:
it's 8:00, barney. dear.
let's play.

127
00:08:16,679 --> 00:08:20,183
? blue moon,
you left me standing alone... ?

128
00:08:20,183 --> 00:08:21,934
would you just shut up?

129
00:09:00,790 --> 00:09:03,926
hmm. good old mouse missile.

130
00:09:15,771 --> 00:09:17,640
(muffled
laughter)

131
00:09:26,882 --> 00:09:29,802
i must be going crazy.

132
00:09:38,477 --> 00:09:41,764
(explosion)

133
00:11:09,418 --> 00:11:11,587
woman:
barney,
where are you?

134
00:11:11,587 --> 00:11:14,640
your partner
wants to make
another toast.

135
00:11:14,640 --> 00:11:15,758
coming.

136
00:11:15,758 --> 00:11:17,827
i'll be right up.

137
00:11:17,827 --> 00:11:19,328
hurry.

138
00:11:24,967 --> 00:11:27,937
(chamber music playing)

139
00:11:57,166 --> 00:11:59,034
uh... here i am.

140
00:12:00,269 --> 00:12:01,704
woman:
there you are.

141
00:12:01,704 --> 00:12:04,156
we thought you disappeared.

142
00:12:06,025 --> 00:12:07,743
well, we made it.

143
00:12:07,743 --> 00:12:13,232
you're on the front page
of the business section.

144
00:12:13,232 --> 00:12:17,837
barney schlesinger, president
of trimboline enterprises...

145
00:12:18,804 --> 00:12:21,023
and his partner,
milton baumsey...

146
00:12:22,875 --> 00:12:25,377
have announced the development
of trimboline three.

147
00:12:25,377 --> 00:12:27,646
then there's
boring history

148
00:12:27,646 --> 00:12:31,584
about barney and his earlier
wonder substances

149
00:12:31,584 --> 00:12:35,304
before we get
to the heart of the matter.

150
00:12:35,304 --> 00:12:37,940
"trimboline three
is a super fuel

151
00:12:37,940 --> 00:12:40,976
"which allows
the automobile
to attain speeds

152
00:12:40,976 --> 00:12:42,578
"as great as
60 miles per hour,

153
00:12:42,578 --> 00:12:44,980
"with a fuel efficiency
of 100 miles per gallon.

154
00:12:45,481 --> 00:12:48,400
"schlesinger
furtherclaims

155
00:12:48,400 --> 00:12:51,137
"that trimboline-powered
automobiles will replace

156
00:12:51,637 --> 00:12:53,889
the horse
in a few years."

157
00:12:55,624 --> 00:12:59,562
i get the impression,
once again, they are skeptical.

158
00:12:59,562 --> 00:13:01,847
and, once again,
they will learn

159
00:13:01,847 --> 00:13:05,367
barney schlesinger
is a manahead
of his time.

160
00:13:05,367 --> 00:13:07,570
well, let's hope so.

161
00:13:07,570 --> 00:13:09,238
a toast.

162
00:13:14,026 --> 00:13:15,144
well...

163
00:13:15,144 --> 00:13:17,029
to my best friend

164
00:13:17,029 --> 00:13:18,197
and partner,

165
00:13:18,197 --> 00:13:21,050
whose inventions
have made the world
a better place,

166
00:13:21,050 --> 00:13:24,203
and all of us
a little richer.

167
00:13:24,203 --> 00:13:25,488
ladies:
hear! hear!

168
00:13:25,488 --> 00:13:26,739
all right.

169
00:13:41,203 --> 00:13:44,273
would you care to
dance, old friend?

170
00:13:51,430 --> 00:13:52,681
yeah.

171
00:13:52,681 --> 00:13:53,749
sure.

172
00:14:06,612 --> 00:14:09,014
sometimes i wish
i'd been born a man.

173
00:14:09,014 --> 00:14:12,017
dancing always seems
to be such fun.

174
00:14:12,017 --> 00:14:13,068
don't be silly.

175
00:14:13,068 --> 00:14:14,854
we weren't built for it.

176
00:14:14,854 --> 00:14:17,873
men's legs are
so much stronger.

177
00:14:17,873 --> 00:14:20,659
we have other talents.

178
00:14:34,106 --> 00:14:37,459
isn't it high time
you made an honest man

179
00:14:37,459 --> 00:14:40,846
of the lovely
mr. schlesinger?

180
00:14:40,846 --> 00:14:42,565
propose to barney?

181
00:14:42,565 --> 00:14:44,199
well, i must admit

182
00:14:44,199 --> 00:14:47,920
the thought has
crossed my mind.

183
00:14:47,920 --> 00:14:51,223
he's so successful
and intelligent.

184
00:14:51,223 --> 00:14:54,176
he's such
a cute dancer.

185
00:14:54,176 --> 00:14:57,112
but, you know,
when he's with me,

186
00:14:57,112 --> 00:15:00,132
i'm never really
sure he's with me.

187
00:15:00,666 --> 00:15:02,418
you know
what i mean?

188
00:15:02,418 --> 00:15:04,119
another woman?

189
00:15:05,354 --> 00:15:07,539
you know
how men are.

190
00:15:21,186 --> 00:15:23,072
thank you for
a lovely evening, barney,

191
00:15:23,072 --> 00:15:25,391
in spite of the weather.

192
00:15:25,391 --> 00:15:27,843
the carriages
are here, ladies.

193
00:15:27,843 --> 00:15:29,712
mr. baumsey.

194
00:15:29,712 --> 00:15:31,597
hurry along,
milt.

195
00:15:39,104 --> 00:15:40,889
you all right, friend?

196
00:15:40,889 --> 00:15:43,108
you seem
distant tonight.

197
00:15:43,108 --> 00:15:45,327
a little tired, maybe.

198
00:15:45,327 --> 00:15:46,929
those dreams again?

199
00:15:46,929 --> 00:15:47,930
dreams?

200
00:15:48,480 --> 00:15:48,998
your dreams--

201
00:15:48,998 --> 00:15:52,067
where you live
in the world next door.

202
00:15:52,067 --> 00:15:56,171
a world where you
are freed from these
responsibilities--

203
00:15:56,171 --> 00:15:59,224
all this fame
and acclaim.

204
00:15:59,224 --> 00:16:02,227
i don't know
what you find so
attractive about it.

205
00:16:02,227 --> 00:16:04,797
it must seem pretty
ridiculous, i guess.

206
00:16:04,797 --> 00:16:06,932
from the details
you've told me,

207
00:16:07,433 --> 00:16:09,051
it sounds... fascinating

208
00:16:09,051 --> 00:16:11,086
in a horrible
sort of way.

209
00:16:13,922 --> 00:16:17,226
barney, i've been
meaning to ask--

210
00:16:17,226 --> 00:16:19,294
am i in those dreams?

211
00:16:19,294 --> 00:16:20,996
oh, yes. yes, you are.

212
00:16:20,996 --> 00:16:22,548
am i still your partner?

213
00:16:22,548 --> 00:16:25,284
milt, i can honestly say that,
in those dreams,

214
00:16:25,284 --> 00:16:27,469
you're still my best friend.

215
00:16:27,469 --> 00:16:30,205
then i'm happy in either world.

216
00:16:35,027 --> 00:16:36,879
stay here,
barney.

217
00:16:36,879 --> 00:16:38,681
we need you as you are.

218
00:16:56,031 --> 00:16:59,118
will that be
all for today,
mr. schlesinger?

219
00:17:00,619 --> 00:17:01,720
uh... yeah.

220
00:17:01,720 --> 00:17:02,788
great, fine.

221
00:17:02,788 --> 00:17:04,039
thank you.

222
00:17:31,950 --> 00:17:34,753
too bad you have to wake up.

223
00:17:34,753 --> 00:17:36,271
(knocking)

224
00:17:37,973 --> 00:17:39,675
(pounding)

225
00:17:46,131 --> 00:17:48,617
i'm sorry to disturb you
on a night like this,

226
00:17:48,617 --> 00:17:51,653
but my carriage broke down
and my horse ran off.

227
00:17:51,653 --> 00:17:52,788
katie?

228
00:17:52,788 --> 00:17:54,556
have we met?

229
00:17:54,556 --> 00:17:58,110
no, no. i don't believe so.

230
00:17:58,110 --> 00:17:59,828
but you know
my name.

231
00:17:59,828 --> 00:18:01,697
you look
like a katie.

232
00:18:01,697 --> 00:18:02,948
oh.

233
00:18:02,948 --> 00:18:07,336
please, go ahead
and sit down

234
00:18:07,336 --> 00:18:09,838
while i find the butler.

235
00:18:09,838 --> 00:18:11,623
uh... jeeves?

236
00:18:15,127 --> 00:18:17,463
morgan!

237
00:18:17,463 --> 00:18:18,714
henry!

238
00:18:18,714 --> 00:18:19,965
coming, sir.

239
00:18:19,965 --> 00:18:25,070
(laughter)

240
00:18:25,070 --> 00:18:26,939
i've driven
by this house

241
00:18:26,939 --> 00:18:28,824
every day and night

242
00:18:28,824 --> 00:18:30,692
for the past
three years.

243
00:18:30,692 --> 00:18:31,944
really?

244
00:18:31,944 --> 00:18:34,446
i always wondered
who lived here.

245
00:18:34,446 --> 00:18:38,050
it never occurred to me
to suspect it would be

246
00:18:38,050 --> 00:18:40,586
the famous
barney schlesinger.

247
00:18:40,586 --> 00:18:43,188
i didn't realize
i was that famous.

248
00:18:43,689 --> 00:18:46,775
would it be impertinent
if i asked you a question?

249
00:18:47,392 --> 00:18:49,161
no. i can't see how?

250
00:18:49,161 --> 00:18:53,816
where do you get your ideas
for those fabulous inventions?

251
00:18:53,816 --> 00:18:55,651
henry:
excuse me,
mr. schlesinger.

252
00:18:55,651 --> 00:18:58,387
the blacksmith has repaired
madam's carriage.

253
00:18:58,387 --> 00:18:59,471
thank you, henry.

254
00:18:59,471 --> 00:19:02,224
madam's garment
has been cleaned

255
00:19:02,224 --> 00:19:04,226
and awaits her
in the guest room.

256
00:19:06,311 --> 00:19:08,997
well, i should
get dressed.

257
00:19:08,997 --> 00:19:10,682
but...

258
00:19:26,048 --> 00:19:27,416
katie:
oh, barney.

259
00:19:27,416 --> 00:19:30,369
i don't know
what to say.

260
00:19:30,369 --> 00:19:32,154
i'd just
about given up.

261
00:19:32,154 --> 00:19:33,405
almost finished, hon.

262
00:19:33,405 --> 00:19:37,109
i don't mind your spending
time here making things

263
00:19:37,109 --> 00:19:39,611
if you'd just straighten up.

264
00:19:39,611 --> 00:19:40,846
(mouths:)
go.

265
00:19:48,487 --> 00:19:49,738
(mouths:)
bye.

266
00:20:00,566 --> 00:20:02,568
good luck, barney.

267
00:20:21,553 --> 00:20:23,422
i can't thank you enough

268
00:20:23,422 --> 00:20:25,307
for your kindness.

269
00:20:25,307 --> 00:20:27,809
no, no. my pleasure.

270
00:20:27,809 --> 00:20:30,312
a little going-away gift
from me to you.

271
00:20:30,312 --> 00:20:31,413
oh, how wonderful.

272
00:20:31,413 --> 00:20:36,184
where on earth did you find
an orchid at this time of year?

273
00:20:36,184 --> 00:20:37,953
no, it's mechanical.

274
00:20:37,953 --> 00:20:39,171
see? i made it.

275
00:20:39,171 --> 00:20:40,872
you made it?

276
00:20:46,995 --> 00:20:50,349
i'm holding a barney
schlesinger original.

277
00:20:50,349 --> 00:20:51,500
yes.

278
00:20:51,500 --> 00:20:53,368
thank you so much.

279
00:20:53,368 --> 00:20:55,170
i'll treasure it.

280
00:20:55,170 --> 00:20:57,039
mr. schlesinger?

281
00:20:57,039 --> 00:20:58,290
just call me barney

282
00:20:58,924 --> 00:21:00,475
please.

283
00:21:00,475 --> 00:21:02,094
would you think me forward

284
00:21:02,094 --> 00:21:04,730
if i called on you
one evening soon?

285
00:21:04,730 --> 00:21:05,781
katie, my girl.

286
00:21:06,281 --> 00:21:09,668
you can find me here
every night from now on.

287
00:21:28,987 --> 00:21:30,989
um... henry?

288
00:21:31,989 --> 00:21:41,989
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